Chapter Thirteen

The ardour of parental affection consumes the heart with its fire.

– American Proverb

The Pacific Ocean shimmered under the pale glow from the rising moon as Mike parked the truck in front of the beach house. Once more he turned to Billy and kissed him on the lips.

The normal hour drive had taken them just over 2 hours, as Mike kept pulling over to kiss Billy. They were on a real emotional high after the little family get together and Billy still seemed to be in shock. He was competing with the sun, as to which was glowing a more brilliant golden hue, and as far as Mike was concerned, Billy was winning hands down.

“Hey there’s smoke coming from the chimney?  What the…”

“Relax, your dad had someone come by and get the place ready Billy, he offered and well, I couldn’t refuse, he really…”

“Whoa, he what? Who? Do you know?”

“No, just that it was a friend he said, someone who would understand and not to worry… ”

“Shit, everyone was in on this but me, how the fuck did you keep this quiet? Man… you are something special mikey… fuck, there go the tears again… hehe”

Mike just reached out and with the tip of his finger he wiped away the small teardrops that were hanging by the corner of Billy’s eyes. He could see the blonde lashes fluttering as his hand touched, and his heart only quickened its own beat.

Damn he was one lucky kid, who would have thought that at 16 he would find the perfect partner? He sure never did, and now, well now maybe Billy would realize that he was here forever, or until Billy grew tired of him.

As Billy started to open the door, to get out Mike made him wait. Billy watched as Mike ran around and opened the door, then took him by the arm and picked him up. He grunted a little but his eyes met Billy’s and suddenly he felt like Hercules.

Billy was laughing a little, the smile curled around his lips as Mike hefted him into his arms. He dangled his feet, wondering when this dream would end, hoping that it never would. He sighed a little as they carefully went up the few steps of the porch to the front door.

Mike fumbled a little with the latch, but finally he managed to get it open and with one foot, kicked opened the door to the beach house, letting Billy gaze into a room completely cast in shadows.

Remnants of a large fire was still glowing in the fireplace and it cast its weird yellow light all over the dark wood paneled room. Mike brought him inside, and set him down just inside, puffing a little as Billy wasn’t exactly the 98 lbs weakling of a few months ago.  That entire running had sure beefed him up, not to mention all that holiday food.

Strange, they walked around, idle chit chat as if they were on a first date or something. Mike could feel the tension, and he was feeling like maybe he had gone to far with this commitment, maybe Billy really didn’t want this, least not just yet. He could see the way he walked around, like a cat on the prowl for prey.

Billy couldn’t get over it. It was just way too powerful, the way his body was aching and his head spinning and now not only had he surprised him with a ceremony, but he had managed to get his father to conjure up some magician to set up a love nest. Damn, how could he have pulled this all off and he not notice?

Maybe he had forced Mike too much, talked to him too much about love and growing old together or maybe not enough? Maybe he had not sent the right signals, and now Mike was trapped, oh God he hoped that wasn’t it, and he looked over at Mike, seeing him prowl around the room, like the floor was made of eggshells instead of solid redwood timbers.

“Mike…”

“Yeah?”

“UH, maybe we should talk…”

“I knew it, this wasn’t a good idea… you hate it don’t you?”

“NO, no I don’t hate it, shit I love it…”

“you are just saying that… I knew it…”

“Look, Mike, this is just, I don’t know, not you…”

“Huh? What do you mean it isn’t me?”

“Well, you never said any of this before, I mean, I know I have talked about it a lot and maybe you thought, well that…”

“What? I may not have said much about this, but gee Billy, I am… hell, you know how I get when I am around you.”

“hehe, yeah hard…”

“Oh sure… see… That’s what I mean.”

Billy stopped his own pacing, he looked into Mike’s dark green eyes, saw his hang dog expression and it suddenly hit him, Mike was his love, there wasn’t anything forced or put on, this was real, and Billy could feel himself trembling.

“Mike… damn it, I am sorry… please.”

“It’s okay, It’s just… sometimes Billy I am so afraid of messing up… and I don’t want to, but I do, like this.”

“Mike, this isn’t a screw up, shit if anyone has blown it here, it’s me… I thought, well…”

“What? Billy I meant every word I said, I really do and all I want is to be next to you… I just, well…”

“well, what Mike? Please, tell me.”

“I just wished you’d believe me.”

Mike finally sat down in a big armchair, before the fire. He placed his head in his hands and stared downwards. His young body trembled with abject failure, his whole thoughts were centred on how he had fucked up and how the one person who he needed most, would reject him now, because he had been a dope.

Billy’s heart started to ache with a terrible strain. He could feel his lungs gasping for more air as the sight of a dejected Mike tore into him. Nothing in his young life had prepared him for this, no one was around to help him either and he had to search for answers that he himself didn’t know, hell he wasn’t even sure he knew the questions.

Slowly he took a couple of deep breaths. The fire had gone out and the room was cast into the darkness of the night, the stars glittering through the large bay windows, the moon still casting its pale glow over everything and the soft sound of the surf echoed among the rooms of the still beach house.

Billy stood there as darkness enveloped him and Mike. The soft sounds of Mike’s sobbing broke through briefly but not enough to make his legs move or his heart be still. The pain was grabbing hold of him and he glanced upwards, a prayer for help on his lips and in his heart.

A sudden gust of wind came rolling over the ocean and blew against the windows, making them rattle in the night and the noise sent a shiver of cold through Billy as he stood there waiting for help. The cold seemed to penetrate his whole body and the shivering was now aided by his chill. His teeth started to chatter a bit as the wind howled around the house, the windows rattling in strange ways.

He closed his blue eyes, begging for help, aching to reach out for Mike when he felt a sudden calm. The wind had stopped and he could hear a soft gentle voice whispering into his ear. He listened, feeling the heat travel through his chest, into his limbs. It was so calming, so soothing, and so wonderful. He breathed in deeply and smelt a strange but familiar scent waft through his nostrils.

As the scent permeated his brain, his legs were moving forward, guided by the soft whispering voice and he could feel his body being gently pushed along, soft delicate hands guiding his every step as if it was his first baby steps. His eyes glowed now, as he looked outwards and up towards the sobbing figure in the armchair.

Billy reached the side of the armchair, and he could feel the deep pain and remorse that Mike was feeling. He could see the ache in Mike’s heart, the way his chest heaved and was being clutched mercilessly by his muscles. He knew that Mike was feeling like he had screwed up, and he also knew that the box on the table next to him held the answer.

A soft push against his arm and he felt his hand lift up, no longer guided by his brain but instead by the soft whispering voice that had him under its spell. He watched as his hand reached out, his fingers trembling as they came closer to the shaking shoulders of Mike.

Mike felt a sudden sharp jolt in his arm. He winced as a deep roaring fire came blasting into his body and his head jerked upwards out of his wet hands. The tears flowing down his cheeks were checked by the sudden pain and heat that just seemed to envelop him.

Blinking, he looked up into the most perfect set of blue orbs, glimmering with a light that he had never seen before. They sparkled and held him, mesmerized by their beauty and their depth. Mike caught his breath, felt his chest suddenly go quiet with the vision that had transfixed him.

His body started to burn with desire and he felt a strange fever take hold of him, one that made his heart ache for the young figure standing next to him. He looked deep into the eyes, seeing the light changing shape, long blonde hair flowed from the dancing light and he could feel a soft whispering voice calling to him.

Billy didn’t know what was happening, his hand was like a blast furnace; his whole body shook as his fingers touched the thin dress shirt that Mike was wearing. His eyes felt like they were being held open as he found Mike peering into them. His heart no longer beat to its own rhythm, instead he found himself sharing it with Mike’s own pulsing heart.

Tiny beads of sweat started to pop up all over as he shuffled his feet so he could stand closer to Mike. Something had pushed him, but no longer. He was acting under his own power, his own will as he felt his hand clasping Mike’s shoulder, felt it firmly grip the strong shoulder muscle. He could feel its power, the way it rippled and shifted under his grip.

The soft whispering voice was familiar and the closer he got to Mike, the more he could smell that wonderful scent, almost of lilacs or something else, something that he had never smelled before and yet, yet was so familiar as if he had know it all his life.

Billy’s leg bumped the table and he saw the small wooden box, and he glanced at the plain design on the box. It had belonged to his mother, and since her death, had rested on his desk in the study. Now it lay here, a small blue ribbon around it.

As his one hand held onto Mike’s shoulder his other hand suddenly seemed to jerk to life and reached for the tiny plain wooden box. His whole body continued to tremble and the voice, the soft gentle whispering voice, started to gently sing a haunting melody. It rang in his ears, then seemed to carry through his whole body as his hand found the box and slid the loosely tied blue ribbon off.

Mike watched the dancing lights in Billy’s eyes, he could feel the strange warmth glowing inside of him, reaching into every corner of his being, searching for every doubt, every fear and as it found them, it chased them out, forcing them to come forward into the light that merely erased them.

His hand flipped open the lid, to expose a small pale rose colour piece of paper, laying on top of two old gold bands. The fingers paused, lightly touching the edges of the paper, feeling the roughness of the edge and seeing the tiny little flower in the one corner. He knew whose paper it was, and he tried to back away, fearful of what it may say and yet as much as his mind urged him to back off, to break his contact with Mike, his heart urged harder that he stay, that he bring out the soft rose coloured paper and read the words on it.

Somehow, the paper was in his hand, slowly being raised upwards, his other hand now digging painfully hard into Mike’s shoulder. The finger tips touching bone as they ached from the strain.

The hand rose in a jerking motion, tears flowed down his cheeks, sweat oozed from every pore in his body and yet he couldn’t stop his arm from moving, his fingers holding onto the small paper. Tears were gushing down his cheeks as he read the simple words.

I know your mother would want you to have these

Dad

Billy could feel the voice inside, the soft whispering voice, as it touched his heart, made hit beat with pride and joy as he re read the simple words, knowing that his father was right and knowing that she would have approved.

His hand put the note aside and with his hand now holding the box he moved to stand in front of Mike and he watched as Mike’s eyes slowly seemed to return from some far off space.

“Mike, you forgot one thing, but until you can get us something else…  would you mind if we used these?”

Billy held the box out towards Mike who slowly lifted his hand, to take the box. His fingers touched those of Billy’s and his heart seemed to leap forward, as if they were to join right then and there. Slowly he brought the box towards him, his eyes lowered to glance inside and he saw the two bands, both of them aged but still shining out, still beaming with an aura of a love that had been.

Mike couldn’t speak, his eyes still flowed with tears and he wasn’t sure yet. The warmth inside of him continued and now he could feel it working its way to his heart, a soft whispering voice coming with it, soothing him, making him relax, letting his body accept the changes.

He put the box on his lap and slowly he touched the rings inside, feeling the voice inside of him grow stronger as he fondled the worn bands. He could feel it, in his fingertips, the sweet feeling of being held, of being cradled and sheltered. It all flowed into him from his fingertips and he just nodded his head.

Mike gazed up into Billy’s sparkling eyes, he saw a huge panorama of blue, all of it cascading in a giant swirling mass but in the centre was a solid shining light of brilliant white, with a long trail of golden strands flowing out and down. He knew then that he had done the right thing.

Slowly, with an unbearable ache in his body, he lifted himself up from the chair and clasped Billy’s hand. No longer was his shoulder being clutched, as now the two stood there, in the middle of the moon bathed room, and Mike took one ring out of the box and looking into Billy’s eyes, he placed it on his ring finger.

Billy felt his knees wobble as the gold band crossed past his knuckles and he could feel nothing more than a pure exuberance. He smiled, and as Mike handed him the box, he took the remaining ring, feeling it warm his hand and he slipped onto Mike’s ring finger.

The two stood there, staring into each other’s eyes and searching for each other. They slowly grew closer together and then wrapped their arms around each other. The touch of their bodies made them both tremble a little and slowly they closed their eyes, slowly the felt their heads being pushed together by a warm gentle touch on the back of their heads.

Their lips touched and it seemed to Mike that skyrockets had suddenly exploded in the room. He could feel their heat as his body shooked and shuddered to the soft press of Billy’s lips on his own. Mike could feel his heart pressing against his chest, eager to pull free and join the other pounding heart that he could feel.

Billy had staggered as their lips met. The force almost knocking him down, as it travelled through his whole body. He could feel the knees wobbling, the arms slowly losing all feeling as the waves of pleasure poured through every vein and artery in his body.

The soft voice had passed through, and the broke apart, nothing but love surrounding them and Mike smiled at his love and arm in arm they left the dark room for the large bedroom.

They opened the door and stared into the large master bedroom. The room was bathed in the dying flickers of several candles, dotted throughout the room. A strong but pleasing odour wafted up to them as they stepped into their room, and stood gazing at the bed.

Both of them just stood there, looking at the turned down bed, a large four poster brass bed, the brass gleaming in the candle light, sending the flickering light everywhere off its polished hide.

Two very large pillows were propped close together and the sheets were folded down. Billy felt a tug in his heart and he could feel Mike feeling the same way as they stared at the soft blue satin sheets, and the two perfect roses, sitting in the centre of the two pillows.

One deep brilliant red rose, vibrating in its colour lay at a 45 degree angle one way, a pure snow white rose, shimmering among the blue of the heavens, lay across it in the opposite direction.  Undying love and true friendship lay crossed on their bed, waiting for the two who it was meant for.

They closed the door and slowly, as if they had discussed it, walked to the large bay windows and in one swift motion they had the windows open and a strong ocean breeze came flowing inside. The candles started to dance even wilder as the wind swirled around them.

Billy turned to Mike, his face glowing in the soft light of the moon, his hair lit up by the gleaming colours from the brass bed. He stared into the green eyes, and he brought Mike’s ring hand up to his lips, and he kissed each finger, then he kissed the ring. Looking up he said,

“Forever”

And then Billy simply shed his clothes. His shirt was falling to the floor as his hands were already moving to remove his pants. The dark suit pants quickly joined the shirt as he stared into Mike’s dark eyes, seeing the passion that was never far from the surface.

With his clothes off he stood there, the wind blowing across his naked body, the smell of the ocean clearly filling the room. Sparks flew between them as their souls reached across the small space, to touch, to feel each other’s presence, then to slowly return, to await their coming union.

Billy moved forward then and with his eyes carefully loving Mike’s, he started to bring Mike to the same state as himself. He had the shirt off and could see the small pink nipples, fully erect and even shaking slightly in anticipation.

The shirt fell to the floor, the buttons clanking on the wooden floors, but neither of the two could hear it as they were locked into each other’s thoughts. No other sounds intruded on their gradual melding of minds.

Mike’s pants lay on top of his shirt and he felt the strong ocean breeze cross around him. His hair moved this way and that in the strong current and yet all he could think of was how lucky he was this very second, how much he was loved this very instant.

Reaching out, Mike’s hand took Billy’s wrist and he brought it up to his heart, letting Billy’s hand rest on his beating chest. He then reached out and placed his own hand against Billy’s chest, feeling the beat, knowing that it was pounding just as his was, together, in unison.

He glanced into the shining blue orbs of Billy’s eyes and he felt his heart go faster, and felt the answering beat in Billy’s own heart. He smiled, knowing that his feelings years ago, when those very same blue eyes had seduced him, were finally to be realized. The promise they had made many years ago when he was too young to understand it fully was now finally being comprehended by his entire being.

Mike took Billy’s hand and headed off to the bed, the last candle flickering out its life as they got to the huge bed, seeing the light play across the soft blue sheets and the two roses.

He carefully lifted the two flowers up, placing them in the waiting vase, and he turned back to Billy, who stood waiting patiently for him. Smiling, he put his hand out and let Billy take it as they climbed into the bed, the soft silky sheets covering their young bodies and with an amazing amount of tenderness, Mike held onto Billy.

As they entangled their bodies, legs over legs, making themselves become one, they kissed long and deep. Mike’s mouth was pressed hard on Billy’s mouth, the arms holding dearly onto each other’s bodies and their groins pressed firmly into each other. IT was as close as two humans could come to becoming one single body.

Billy’s mouth parted to let Mike’s tongue flow inwards, and slowly it did, tasting every inch of the wonderful mouth. Tasting it all, back of the teeth, the rough edges of the tongue that lay submissively inside, the soft tissue at the back of the throat. All of it, Mike’s tongue tasted, again and again, enjoying it each time as if it was the first time he had done it.

Their saliva mixed and became one, their breaths feeding each other’s lungs as they kissed slowly and deeply, time no longer mattering.

Slowly at first, their bodies started to quiver. As the passion from deep within their bodies started to flow, the more their bodies ached and the more their limbs shook. It was like sitting on the ground by the railway tracks.

First there was the distant rumble in the seat of your pants, then as the speeding train came closer, the ground would shake more, and as it past, your whole body was bouncing on the hard ground. So to was it now, as their passion came to the surface.

At first, they merely quivered a little, then as the kiss grew in intensity, as their young naked bodies groaned under the soft satin sheets, the quivering moved to become a rolling tremor of joy. Their young bodies shook harder, their limbs twisting under the pressure and still they kissed, letting their bodies have their way.

At last the kiss ended, and with a loud groan and sigh the two broke apart, their heads no longer locked at the lips and they stared at each other, slowly letting the passion cool, as their hearts gradually returned to a normal beat.

Billy couldn’t believe it, he felt so loved by nothing more than a simple kiss and the smile that crossed his face only made Mike’s heart skip several beats. He felt his whole body quiver one last time and he knew that the deep wet warmth that filled their lower bodies was a mixture of his love and that of Mikes and for him, it was all he ever wanted, it was how he wanted every night of his life to end, with Mike’s love covering him and filling him.

Mike could see the smile growing as his body slowly returned to normal. It no longer rocked and trembled and the deep wet warmth that had spread across his groin was a reminder to him of just how much he needed and loved Billy. Nothing else mattered to him but to bring total and complete pleasure to the body and man that lay in his arms now, covered with the mixture of their love for each other.

Neither were sure which explosion was it that had released their love, they couldn’t care less because each time they had felt themselves rocked by some overpowering force, they had known total love and passion. Each time that their hearts had raced out of control, each time their brains had reeled under the overwhelming joy of love, they knew that this was only a beginning of a journey that would last for eternity.

Safe in that thought, they came together again, kissing briefly as sleep overtook them and they lay there, the wind from the ocean gently rocking them in their brass bed, gently caressing their sweat soaked bodies that were totally spent. Finally, the doubts could find no purchase, no hold to scream forth from and the fears could find any means to open the secrets of the hearts, or torment the recesses of the mind. Sleep kept them at peace as their bodies relaxed, yet never releasing their touch of the other.